These Things I Know To Be True--Simple Tips From a Life Dangerously Low on Absolutes

• Never sit on a monkey's cage. I can't say this often enough. Make of it what you will.
• Don't sing while you clean the toilet.
• Be the bigger person. Every time. You'll never regret it, but it won't be easy.
• Be kind even when you have an excellent bitchy slam. My excellent bitchy slams usually come to mind about 48 hours after they'd have been useful anyways. I use them in novels.
• Try not to allow more than one thing to exit your body at a time. For instance, a burp, hiccup, sneeze combo is to be avoided if at all possible. 
• What other people think of you only matters if you care and believe them.
• Everything changes, maybe not as fast as you'd like, but give it time.
• If you always try to make other people happy, you never will be.
• Life will make more sense if you're honest.
• If you can't say something nice about yourself, try harder. You are a brief, priceless light in time. Own it. 
• When people gossip they are ugly and boring and sound stupid. Every. Single. Time. 
• Playing isn't just for kids. Do it.
• It's easy to fall asleep in your own life, and sleep walk through it. 
• If you can download life's frustration (all the annoying, stupid, mundane, and infuriating) into some type of art, you will be happier for it. May I suggest:
• Slam Poetry *insert your bitchy slams here*
• Graffiti on paper
• Secret cartoons of your boss
• Your creative endeavors DO NOT have to be perfect, professional, shared, OR make you boatloads of money to be priceless. If they lower your stress level and keep your from strangling co-workers, they've served their purpose.
• No matter what you know about someone else's life, you know nothing about anyone else's life.
• Never let food replace loving, if you know what I mean, and don't let eating become the highlight of your day.
• If you spend more time thinking about someone else's life than your own, you might want to rethink that. 
• Never say my dog doesn't bite or my kid wouldn't do that. Just be sure YOU wouldn't bite or do that. Mastery over ourselves is all we can hope for.

Did I miss anything? What do you know to be true in life? Please share some of your absolutes.

Be sure to look over on the right side of my blog and register for the Rafflecopter giveaway. I'm celebrating my new book release of FOREVER The Constantines' Secret. I'm also attempting to finish up my next book within the next six weeks. If you see me out and about in the world, and I'm talking to myself, it's just deep thinking and part of the process. Are you buying it? Because it could be true, but could be true is another blog post entirely.